History Major Fails to Learn From Past Hell Weeks
ARH- History major Ari Cohen, '10, has pulled two straight all-nighters in order to finish his work for finals, much like this time the previous two years. This is because the history major has failed to learn from the past.
“I tried spacing out my work over the past two weeks, but then I convinced myself I could write two ten page papers and my seminar paper in three days. I know in the past I've had a problem putting my work off, but this semester it seemed like my papers would write themselves. I actually was wrong about that,” said Cohen.
Fellow History major and friend Toby Breen '11 provided possible historical interpretations of Cohen's plight. “Are we to see Ari as a great man in history that has tragically fallen? How will history make sense of this?”
This past week, Cohen has been to 3 A.M. pancakes every night. This is eerily similar to this point last semester when he went to 3 A.M. pancakes every night and had a total of six hours of sleep, which was also reminiscent to this point last year when he went to 3 A.M. pancakes and had 7 total hours of sleep, which was exactly like every other semester he has had at this college.
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